What To Do: The "Christmas Gifts"?

At one time or another we have all received "gifts" that have left us in a quandry. The dilemma arises because one person in the "gift-giving" relation does not view the "gift" as a gift, however well meaning the giver may be. The "gift" is only a gift if both persons, the giver and the recipient, view it as such. Gift-giving that has an agenda is not a gift; gift-giving that is self-serving of one's self-image is not a gift; gift-giving that is obligatory, a more expensive version of the "card for card...", is not gift-giving. So the confusion of Christmas gifts is compounded.
If the Christ of your Christmas is not viewed as a "gift" what are the "giver" and the "getter" to do? If one has the power or influence I suppose one could pass a law requiring the manger scene, with accompanying choir of angles, be prominently displayed in the town square: kind of a Christian version for America of the "loyalty oath" being proposed in Israel's Knesset for the "strangers" in the midst of the Jewish majority. But what kind of blessing is this kind of "gift"? Even given perhaps you really do need that sweater that Aunt Jane knitted!
Most people today are able to discern the coercion, subtle though it may be, that lurks behind some gift-giving. All motivations are similarly revealed for what they truly are about...sooner or later.
The spirit behind much gift-giving may come as an "angel of light", but the wolf in sheep's clothing will surely be revealed. Gifts come in all sorts of wrapping, in all sorts of forms, and in all sorts of spirits. There are gifts in the material/physical world, gifts in the realm of the soul (the endless holiday music!!), and gifts in the realm of the spirit. Something may appear to be a gift in one of these realms, but upon closer examination, is not a gift in the other remaining realms. A true gift is a "true" gift in all three realms: the physical/material world, the world of the soul, and in the realm of the spirit. If the "gift" is not a gift in any one of these three realms, it is not a gift, it is not a blessing, and it has no "Life."
So what to do?
You can construct your own list, as have I over the years, of solutions to this annual dilemma. Here are a few of the one's I have adopted: return the gift to the place of purchase, get a refund, and give the proceeds to your favorite charity. But of course, that is not always possible. Return the gift to the giver with a note of explanation...e.g. your "taste" has changed. But of course, that hand-made scarf with accompanying "Christmas Note" from.....makes that impossible. Give it to the "Salvation Army"... Or simply stick "it" in a back corner of a seldom visited closet or up to the attic I trudge with that troublous article...and then feel awful, awful... Burn it in the holiday fireplaces, or pitch it in the dumpster! Sometimes the item is so blatantly offensive to either the flesh, the soul, or the spirit: my answer to the "what to do" is swift and merciless!
Or one can receive the "gift" and then agonize endlessly over what to do and how to respond... Have you ever given a "gift" in pay back? Like maybe you got a chunk of coal in your stocking, and you get back by giving a "heater" with that chunk of coal inside burning brightly: get the metaphor?
The personalized gifts are perhaps the most difficult: the embroidered "Christmas" tie with your name in mistletoe green has to go to the dumpster. Re-gifting? Too many chances of being found out!! Or perhaps "An Extreme Total Makeover? I adopted this solution to an original piece of metal sculpture: the extreme makeover resulted in a Hanukkah menorah.
Perhaps it is time for the "givers" to take a hard look at themselves, amend their ways, and save all of us "receivers" a lot of grief. But perhaps I am avoiding the question of "What to do...?" by passing the buck back to the givers?
Maybe I just need to take the responsibility of deciding and acting on who and what I allow to come into my life?